What Inspires Me

I love writing about my daughters because it allows me to express my feelings for them when they have tired of my million hugs and kisses. It allows me to gloat and mope and reflect on the way I parent them. Talking about my writing to my husband the other night, he said he considers this an accomplishment; I didn’t agree because I am not a published writer and I am not even that good at it. But he continued and said it is an accomplishment because I can express my feelings and put them in writing better than most people can – he convinced me. It feels good to think of this as an accomplishment when all I really do is say I love my children. That takes absolutely no effort on my part, they do all the work.

This got me thinking about why I write and what triggers my wanting to write when something trivial happens in our lives. As I was trying to find reason and rhyme to this question, the only recurring thought was: THEM. Their faces when they laugh, cry, scream, get mad, get hurt; their expressions when they’re happy, excited, scared or sleepy. I keep playing their voices in my head when they are playing or talking to themselves and think no one is listening. All I have to do to write is sit back and enjoy their life. Learn from them, have fun with them. How can I not be inspired by the miracle that a child is? They fill my life with meaning and hope ...

Simply said, Elizabeth and Victoria are the light of my life. They inspire me with every step they take and teach me about life with every conversation we have, encourage me with their persistence and strength; they are constantly reminding me of ways to be happy and enjoy simple things. When they say “mom, I love you”, they mean it, no strings attached. When I kiss them good night, it really does make them feel safe. When their soft, small and dirty hands hold mine, I find my way in this crazy world.

Nothing beats that. There is nothing for me to do but do write about it so that I never forget how wonderful it feels to have two little girls in my life who loved me before they even knew what love is. And even though I don’t think about when they grow up (because I want to live in today), the few times I do think about the future, I realize that one day they won’t need me as much as they do now. When that time comes I'm sure I'll still need them plenty – but hopefully reading this will soothe me. Hopefully.